Our Worth

In the land of opportunity, have we felt so pressured to be impressive that we've lost the plot?

I was listening to a podcast a few weeks ago where the format was a roundtable, and the topic was on the future of America given the recent election. The commentators came from a variety of backgrounds, and some reside in the US and some in the UK. So naturally points of comparison between the US and UK came up. One of the commentators (who resides in the UK) noted this sort of difference between the two countries that he believed was responsible for the US's continued economic growth vs. the UK's which has lagged behind. The example he used was that an entrepreneur in the US will start a business, then start another and another, or build a franchise model. In the UK, he described the scenario as more likely for an entrepreneur to build one business and leave it at that. Surely, from a pure economics standpoint, his analysis makes sense. But this podcast, and this particular part of the conversation has stuck with me for weeks. It had me thinking about our priorities as a nation.

I'm a big YouTube gal and love watching videos from people of all backgrounds. I happen to follow a lot of people who live outside the US, and in fact, a lot of people who live in the UK. A lot of the people I follow in the UK just record your typical day in the life content, and what I've always been drawn to is the simplicity of their lives. What they prioritize, how they spend their time, what lights them up. It feels more true to me and who I am and how I feel then many oof the Americans I follow. And I think that the key difference in many ways come back to this idea that this commentator mentions. I think that in the US we are really pushed to believe that more is more. That we need to be the biggest, the best, the fastest… you get the point. Some of our greatest challenges have been a result of this. Landfills piled with all the things we turned and burned at a high rate of speed. An environment in dire straits because of our constant consumption and lack of mindfulness. And for what? We're certainly not happier. Depression and suicide are rampant, and the solution isn't to address the root cause- it's a pill. It's substances that lead to abuse. The "solutions" are things that cost us more money. People are profiting off our problems. I know I'm not stating anything revolutionary here, and I'm also not trying to say that this is the case for all Americans. But I would say it's true for most of us in one way or another.

Why is more the answer? Why is it assumed that more, is better? We've already heard the statistics that money does not make people happier. That after your basic needs are met, along with enough extra to take your family on vacation for example, more money will not bring more happiness. I think our challenge is that the things that make us most happy and content, are the things most people don't have time (or as much as they'd like/should) to enjoy because they're so busy working to make money. And somehow as we continue to grow, the money we make becomes less and less sufficient to survive off of. And then we use the money on cheap thrills- things that will produce a dopamine hit like shopping. More accumulation. More to add to the landfill. We're in this horrible cycle. Some people are working multiple jobs to make ends meet. And even then, they can't afford to buy a house for example. Meanwhile we have people making more money than they'll ever need, who could abolish homelessness and food insecurity. Something is very very broken. Why do we so often see the people who have the least, giving the most? Because they know what's important and they know what the key to happiness is. Happiness and fulfillment comes from being in community. From treating our neighbors like ourselves. To helping those who need help.

There's no one size fits all solution to this situation we're found ourselves in. I think that's part of where we've gotten off track. We try to make the same model work for everyone. We've been conditioned to believe that "sameness" is best. That we need to belong, that we need to get approval, that we need to do what society tells us is the right thing/the right way of being. What if all of this focus on growth and being impressive has been at the direct expense of our happiness? I'm someone who was very conditioned to believe in playing by the rules, to striving for achievement in the hamster wheel of life. To keeping up with everyone. It took everything reaching critical mass in my life and then falling into broken bits to realize that path wasn't working for me. And when I tried to piece the broken bits back together, I started to question if that was what I even wanted. It took me awhile to figure out that it wasn't. When I discovered Human Design, a lightbulb went off. It really resonated with me. It was like this concept that was always there that I never knew about, that was my north star to figuring out my own path. Whether you're curious or believe in human design or not, the key concept behind it is worth considering. We all came here uniquely to be individuals with very different strengths and gifts to bring to the world. We came with unique purposes and missions. And I believe that's why the one size fits all narrative doesn't work for us. We're not meant to operate that way. Some people are meant to build and scale businesses, and boost the economy. Some people are meant to raise compassionate human beings who will change our world for the better. Some are meant to make beautiful art in different forms, that help us see the world differently. Some are meant to hold space where people gather together in meditation.

We all came here for a reason, and our value shouldn't be measured only by our contribution to the economy. We shouldn't only be able to survive by making a certain dollar amount. We are all here contributing in our unique ways, and it is all of value. Imagine a world where everyone just works all the time, hates their job and is miserable, and just runs that life on repeat every day until they die? And for what? That isn't life. Some people are capable of working very little, and in a way that isn't taxing to them, while making a ton of money. Should someone who isn't capable of that, who didn't come here with those particular gifts and skills, be punished or miserable because that's not their gift to the world?

The current political climate is trying to force us to divide. It's trying to separate us and make us at war with one another. Trying to show us that we're of differing level of value in this world. What we need now more than ever is to come together. To appreciate that each of us comes here uniquely to offer something different. That we all benefit from things each other brings to the table.  

This past week my work had me surrounded by my community. It is one of the things that brings me the most joy and why I started my business in the first place. Gathering people together and creating beauty. My business isn't making me millions, or having a huge impact on the economy. I don't have plans to expand in a hugely consequential way, or to remove myself from the day to day work. Does that make my business, and me, less valuable? Isn't the connection, the beauty, and the joy worth more than any dollar amount? I didn't start my business to become a millionaire. I've felt the pressure like any other business owner of making my business like others. But I've already figured  out from my past experiences that trying to make myself fit like the others is never going to fulfill me. I'm here to charter my own path, and I think that's what we should all stay true to. Supporting ourselves, supporting each other, and supporting our greater community in the way we each uniquely came here to. I truly believe that the one size fits all model isn't working for us. That if we all offer our own unique talents and skills rather than trying to be like everyone else, we have more to offer.  

I don't want to live in a country where the economy is what we're admired for. I want to live in a country that prioritizes our individual well being. Where every person is seen as valuable and important. And is the economy negatively impacted by that way of living and operating? I don't know. I'm not an economist, obviously ;) But maybe part of what I came here to offer is a different perspective on our worth. It starts in our own communities, in the way we treat our neighbors and strangers. To see the worth in every one.

XO