Time Well Spent
According to my apple devices, my screen time was down 40% this week. 40%!!!
When I saw that stat this morning, I honestly was so happy. I made a concerted effort to spend less time on my phone, and it showed. I talked about this a few weeks ago in my living in the moment post. That was one of the best weeks I had had in awhile, and a lot of that was due to my decreased screen time. This time my intention behind it was different. And to be clear, it has to be an intention/goal in order for it to even happen. I don't think any of us realize how much time we spend on our screens. If you have an intention to spend less time on your phone, you will find it is taking up way more of your time than you ever realized. And that it's become a compulsion of sorts. Ok forgive me for getting graphic but, how many of you (like me) look at your phone while you're sitting on the toilet? SERIOUSLY. Do you even realize you do it? How many of you click on a social media icon of choice on your phone as soon as it's in your hand? It literally becomes subconscious. In my experience, the commitment to spend less time on my phone is the only thing that led me to realize I was doing all of these things. Waiting in line at the store? Scrolling. Bored? Scrolling. Anxious? Scrolling. Waiting? Scrolling. In bed? Scrolling. It's out. of. control. We don't know how to just be. We now require constant stimulation and dopamine hits. The difficult part is that so much of our life has become technology dependent, so we don't even realize half the time that we're doing anything that maybe isn't the best use of our time. The reality for many of us is that there is a necessary amount of time we need to be on screens to accomplish our jobs, etc. The question is how much of it is intentional, necessary and productive- vs. the alternative.
Our screens have become a way to numb and to find comfort. Then we reach for them any time we feel the slightest bit of discomfort. It is an addiction like anything else. And the thing is, just like drugs, the product, our phones/the apps on them, are designed to be addictive. It's not our fault that we've become addicted. But we can recognize the problem and make decisions around our intention. When social media first started out, think about the intention of Facebook originally. It was to help us stay connected to people from our lives, and reconnect with people from our past. The evolution came when the like button came into play. When all of social media became not so much about connection, but about a popularity contest and a way to feel like your life was about likes and figuring out the "algorithm." Eyeroll.
I listened to a Mel Robbins podcast recently ("Before you waste time, listen to this") and it was eye opening. Research shows that we will spend 20 years of our life on screens. The amount of time is staggering. And I think all of us can agree that we can think of ways we would rather be spending our time. But the point is we have to make the decision to do something about it, because it's not going to happen without effort. These apps are designed to keep us addicted. Frankly, it's a brilliant business model ;)
When I realized my own habits, it was eye opening. I then remembered that my efforts a few weeks ago had resulted in a really great week. Seeking to recreate that feeling this past week, I determined that I didn't think that spending as much time on my phone was going to result in the feeling I wanted. As a business owner there is a certain amount of pressure to be present on social media, and to produce content. For now, my solution was to post with intention, and minimize my time otherwise spent on the app. Open the app, post, give a few likes to anything top of my feed, get off. No scrolling. The scrolling is where it becomes mindless, numbing, and the land of comparison and judgement. It's another thing to throw me off my path to joy. I don't want to spend my time judging myself, or others, based on a highlight reel of what they have decided to share. I don't want to spend my time concerned about what anyone else is doing. What does it have to do with my life? The problem is, if I'm on there scrolling, I will find ways to make it about my life. How I stack up. Who's doing what fab thing, while I'm sitting at home scrolling? It is literally in direct contradiction to my intention in how I want to live my life, and how I want others to live theirs. My life (and your life) isn't about comparison. We're all here on a different journey. I only want to do what makes me happy. I want to live in peace, filled with joy and with purpose. How do I have clear head space, to think about how I bring peace, joy and purpose into my life, if I'm focusing on everyone else's life? How do I get into a creative headspace, to dream up new things? How do I unplug?
If you're wondering how I spent all the extra time I had on my hands, I'll tell ya ;) I would notice a compulsion to constantly tap on apps on my phone pretty constantly. Initially, it would be on a social media app and I would immediately catch myself and x out. If I still felt the compulsion, I'd go to something like the weather app LOL. I know, redic. But it seemed like the most harmless alternative. Gradually, the compulsion lessened- but I'll be honest in saying it never totally went away. Beyond that, when I would have spent time scrolling, instead I either turned on a podcast, or I read a book. I don't know exactly how many podcasts I listened to, but do you want to know how many books I read this week? 3. THREE BOOKS. Now. The books I read were for pleasure. But imagine if they had been focused on some sort of research or goal I had?! Imagine how much I could have learned in that timeframe!!! To be clear, I have no regrets that I was reading fictional books on murder LOL. It was exactly what I needed. And to be fair a lot of the podcasts I listened to were educational/self development focused ;) But the point I'm making. We are wasting our precious time. And are we feeling filled up? Are we living the life we want to live? Or are we just choosing the drug because it's quick and easy.
I want more out of this life, and I know you do too. But we have to fight for it, because no one is going to do it for us. Maybe you want more time to relax; to connect with friends or family; to start a hobby; to create; to learn; to workout; maybe to just be. Whatever it is, it’s within reach. We just have to make the choices around where that time goes, and choose wisely ;)
xo
